CLASSROOM CAPERS part 1

Ok friends time to amuse you some more with some more classroom tales from the chronic back bencher ,the storyteller par - excellence , the narcissistic yours truly. Well its true that the guys from Manufacturing had started the first official BBC , but i was the one to brand market it , so shove it guys its my story.

Life from the back benches is always a one of perspective introspection ... you can choose to either immerse yourself in quiet reading or you can choose to be the part of the team that is always involved in contributing to the ruckus in the class.
9 :15 and the AEC class commences ....you would think that the people watching a football match would be more disciplined than the BBCians gracing the classrooms. The Analog Electronic Circuits madam was never on time ...(And we always cursed the damn Railway system). 15 minutes late she was and that suited us just fine.Time to catch up on all the latest gossip from the hostels and enough time to ogle at the girls gracing the front benches .

Ma'am would finally walk into the class and the rukus would just go up a notch further. I have one of those irritating gunfiring sounds (from the game Counter Strike)in my cell and once the din died down a bit ,few of us hooligans would play the soundtrack from under the benches . Salvo after salvo of bullets pierced the quiet classroom air and the sounds of spent casings would follow. And funnily she would pretend not to notice.
But we were not to be fazed .....i have one of those cartoon ....POOING.... sounds in my cell( the sound you would often hear when the eyes of a cartoon character popped out balanced on spring ends) The most hilarious part of that sound was that it was played at the perfect timing. Whenever she would be solving something on the board ( which she rarely did) and if she would get stuck on some technicality ( which she always was) POOING the noise would ring out loud and clear eliciting a an uproar from the back benches and even a snigger or two from the girls at the front.

Well girls you have to admit that without the ocassional fun ....(well occasional was an understatement it was perpetual ) i am sure none of you would have even survived the dead boring class. The noises were just the appetizers , the main course was the witty one liners from the back ...be it to a girl at the front or to one of those snotty first line guys or to the teacher , that really made our day.

An example - Whenever we would be asked a question , whether we knew the answer or not ...NO IDEA was the perfect alibi. Once she asked all the people in the back for the answer and she got an unanimous response. Even that rascal Sanjay Das was browbeaten into submission to reiterate that punchline ......it is the perfect foolproof answer for any class regardless of the reputation of the taecher.

Once even i had the impunity of asking the teacher what the hell was the question was when i was asked something and she realised the ultimate truth that the Back benchers were incorrigable.

At the end of the day every teacher does realise that the BBC is an organised racket at the back whose existance is a separate entity in the classroom . It s firmly entrenched in the classrooms and no amount of coercion would ever break our camarederie. The copy in our hands were just a formality, Lab notes and novels would be lapped up in the class time. It is amusing that how much the human brain can shut out outside disturbances while pursuing a thing of interest.
You thought that people like me whiled away their time in the classroom at the back, but let me remind you that the most worthwhile reading time i get is at the back.It is a place where people get to pursue their individual talents rather than be a part of the herd.

Time to go folks .... i have a class now and if i dont hurry i wont be able to get balcony seats for the show.

CLASSROOM CAPERS

This blog is a tribute , or rather i should say a fond remeberance to all those who died waiting for the boring classes in UCE to end. Now this is isnt a figment of my imagination , it is etched on the back benches of our classrooms. The sense of ennui was so great that it brought out the artist in them.

Doodles of all kinds graced the benches,reminiscent of cavemen paintings of the monolithic era. Lovers evoked their feelings with blood (rolling your eyes ...well it was the cheap ink of red ball pens).But the best part was the expletives that were used for the teachers......abuses so creative that it would be a paen to Edward De Bono (and his creative out of the box thinking skills lectures).You would think that the very teacher had made him eat snails for lunch, after reading the amount of words and the ferocity of language used. Abuses so creative , it would either make you roll in laughter or make you keel over and die thinking that future engineers of the country are prone to such gross mindset.

And thus as a retaliation against all the humiliation , the long supressed soul of the back benchers found utterance ,( as the first benchers drawled on and on , pens scrawling mindlessly using up all the precious paper). A tryst with destiny was created .....The BBC was born (The Back Benchers Community ). Generations of students have owed their alleigance to the community and anyone and everyone can join.

But there are some ground rules .
Rule no. 1 - Never even bother to listen to what the teacher is saying ( even though he is yelling that the building is on fire ). DONT EVEN TAKE THE PAIN OF STRAINING YOUR CRANIAL MUSCLES TO LOOK UP.

Rule no. 2 - Well this rule is strictly for UCE students .... No girls allowed in the BBC. And moreover never especially in the electrical branch.

Rule no. 3 - Never take more than one copy. It is in compliance with the rules of Greenpeace. Imagine the number of trees felled in the Amazon just to make one copy.We as responsible members of the planet do not want to endanger the lives of the various species of our home.
And the single copy also doubles up as a cartoon copy(This is in case of an emergency ,when the teacher is hell bent on boring you to coma)

Rule no. 4 - PROCRASTINATION IS OUR MOTTO.Never submit assignments on time delay till the last minute and then work on the assignment like your ass is on fire ....This is loads of fun guys.. you really feel like a true corporate honcho when you finish your assignments in the wee hours of the morning , just before class.and then catch on your beauty sleep in the back benches. (The Network theory bbok makes a great pillow once you put your kerchief on it.)

Rule no. 5 - Always have a repertoire of one liners ready, so that whenever one of those idiotic front benchers stand up and answer throw one at them and then snigger . This really works,its enough to fluster the person answering.

Rule no. 6 - Never show up in class on time .Always reach 15 minutes late and then keep a good excuse handy.

Rule no. 7- Once you are in BBC you are hereby forbidden to ever grace the first bench.

Rule no. 8- Bunking classes but getting marked present , is the holy grail of the BBC ...Now i am not going to tell you the secret of that ...you will have to use your own grey matter to figure how to achieve this feat.

Rule no. 9- Follow all the above mentioned rules and stick to them . Swear by them and do not ever try to forsake your fellow BBCians .

And after your death .... a headstone shall be installed in class

Here was a noble soul who died for the cause of BBC
Blest be the one who spares these stones
Curst be the one who moves his bones.

Well classroom capers continue ...if i could write everything it would be a hardbound volume , thick enough for fellow BBCians to sleep on.For more action in the class ...log on to my blogsite ...same place ...same time.