A sequel to my highly controversial blog MEN ARE FROM MARS AND WOMEN FROM VENUS....this blog post delves deep into the emotional psyche and the character make up of the human race.
For this blog i have to draw my conclusions from the just concluded exams of ours...A cursory glance at the result sheets would send common guys like me into cardiac arrest.just before that allow me to draw up an analogy that would make my case more watertight.
The world sat up and applauded when a young Nadia Comaneci got a perfect 10 in the winter olympics for her scintillating gymnastic display...and almost 30 years after a girl from the non-descript town of Burla has replicated the effort.......albeit this time it was the exam grades.The girl DEVASHREE's scorecard reads O O O O O O O O O O ...looks like some office clerk was playing with a puncher.And her SG stands at a perfect 10."Kudos to her"you would expect me to say ..."but why the hell cant you get lower grades ??"i ask in frustration ...How can i tell my parents that our highest grade is a 10...thats why everytime i scale down the highest grades to just 0.7 above my own grades....that way i can avoid the nagging of my mom...Anyways great effort Devashree ....when do you plan to break out the champagne ???
Yep i told you girls were all devillish and freaky....they meddle with the universe's entropy and think of ways to bring a little more orderliness into the chaos driven world.Guys dont care two hoots about being perfectionists..thats why Leonardo and Michealangelo broke a tiny part of their statues after its completion, otherwise too much perfection would invite the wrath of the Gods.So I think my branch mates Shraddha and Santwana are spared of divine wrath with their almost perfects grades of 9.83........If i ever saw that grade on my result sheet i would have to be airlifted to hospital.
Let me give you some more insights into the ongoing contrasts.....
TIME 7pm :- My hostel would be alive with people having their snacks....most of them grabbing from each other ...people milling around the notice board ....people coming back from the ground after a match of cricket or volleyball and people planning on what brand of booze to buy for that nights party....
a ubiquitious sight you would say and shrug it off.......
And then i choose to give you an insight into the LADIES HOSTEL...(Of course these are just excerpts from my conversations with Mridu ...so if any of these facts are wrong ...you know whom to prosecute :) )
TIME 7pm:- Girls are glued to their tables.... pens furiously scratching away .....making their lab notes ready as if they were going to be hung in an art gallery.....frantically rifling through books that could kill a person if dropped on him........everyone all washed up and after their evening prayers....the smell of incense wafting through the corridors .......and a deathly eerie silence engulfs the air....a sudden assault on the auditory senses ..a shriek ..a cry of delight...snippets of loud laughter of a girl conversing with her lover are all frowned upon....Noise is almost a blasphemy during study hours and the perpetrator would get murderous glances from her roommates.
And come exam time the study hours just get longer....food , drink, movies are forgotten...girls enter a world of oblivion...books...notes...question papers in hand ...trying to guzzle in all info at hand and study as if the world was about to end tomorrow.And one thing i ve noticed about them is that every girl has her own book , notes and question paper...sharing is a word not found in their lexicon
And in our case....often 6 people share the same book.Why...our whole wingmates had to rely on 2 BK publication guides during the maths exam..and we rotated it around in shifts....One gets accustomed to this style of reading during the exams in our wing...During my 3rd semester exams that rascal Ramesh from Civil shared an OB book with not only me (the sponsor) but with 12 other people ..the book got so torn up in the process i daresay that the guy selling groundnuts in front of my hostel used the pages for selling his wares.Once again I use the word "doubtful authenticity" when i see a book in Anubhav's hand claiming that it is his book.It must have been a joint venture with 5 other people....and sometimes the whole hostel shares a single question paper...the word "MINE" often gets blurred when you enter engineering life.....Its only yours till you stop using it.And after the exams if any guy is seen with a book in his hands then he has to bear the brunt of taunts that dog him everywhere until he decides to put the book back into the cobweb infested shelf.
Apart from the mundane dull grey world of studies ...if i give you an insight into the dark realms of the female mind then you would shudder in horror ....appalled....horrified....terrified and all other "fied" adjectives .
"Their minds are really dark and deep,
dark secrets they tend to keep
and wont hesitate to kill you in your sleep"
are some of the words that Robert Frost would have liked to say , but didnt want to harm his female fan following.So i choose to risk it.
Ive heard girls like to tune into gossip and gleefully like to gang up against girls they secretly are envious of......effect of watching too many "K"soaps...all of them emulating the sexy vamps we guys tend to drool over every evenings on TV.Once they get into a fight with other girls then they are like simmering embers...just waiting for the next spark to fuel the fires.
While if we guys ever enter a fight then its a no -holds -barred contest with all kinds of kicking and punching and abusing involved...but after a few hours after everything cools down ...we share a laugh over a cup of tea and all the ill will is forgotten.I remember Prateek and me had a food fight ......we were throwing around mutton pieces and smearing each other with muttin curry ...really was a big fight....but it died down in one day and we are still best of buddies...although sometimes i marvel at the way how i had thrown a small mutton piece all the way across 3 tables and had hit him squarely in the neck...signs of an expert sniper...
We tend to let it all out...kicking and punching for us acts as a catharsis for our pent up rage...while girls let the ill feeling fester and simmer away ..ever waiting for an opportune moment to strike back.
And then once again in the emotional context girls are way more scarier.recently when my sisters bunny rabbit died...i smsed all my friends.Me , my brother and all my guy friends joked around and suggested that we make a barbecue of the rabbit...For all of you who didn't know rabbit meat is very tender and juicy...perfect for an ideal dinner.And my sister was crying all afternoon and still remembers how the rabbit used to cuddle up to her.My cheeky little cousin brother...around Reechels age suggested we flush it down the toilet and i had ahuge laugh about it.Guys are so imaginitive i tell you ....
And then when i amde the mistake of letting Mridu and my friend Shraddha know of reechel's plight they were all like cushions of sorrow...expressing their heartfelt sorrow and proceeding to give me a lecture on my heartlessness...taking the opportunity to give me a dressing down on my inhuman behaviour...and all sorts of advice.....
Girls i tell you are too emotionally attached to their things....Mridu often tells me how she treasures many worthless things and she still remebers who gave what to her ...and attaches huge emotional baggage to it.I ve heard of girls who treasure their notebooks from KG which serves as a mnemonic to their childhood...
SHEESH.....i believe in looking ahead...i tend to break most of my things after prolonged use and throw it into the nearest dustbin after its "validity expires".And i cant even think about an instance where i have treasured something for more than a year.Reechel has a shiny pen that my uncle gave her...she treasures it and hasnt written a single word with it since 4 years...if i had that pen i would have finished it off in 3 monts and then would have ended up losing the cap and then would have ended up playing with the internal springs....
well guys tend to be pragmatists...God gave us heads and girls hearts is what i would like to surmise after my observations.Thats why we guys fall head over heels in love with the for their qualities..and thus ending the MARS VS VENUS debate ......Cheerio folks ...enjoy your summer holidays
